You love me, even when I'm not at my best

Sometimes I'm a bitch.  I don't mean to be.  I'm still working on processing my emotions before I just boil over and spill them out, while screaming at the top of my lungs.  Apparently, I don't know how to express myself before it gets to that, in a way that is clear to everyone else.  I apologize for you having to bear the brunt of it.  I truly am working on it, but it's just so easy for me to bottle it all up and be laid back about what is bothering me...often I wouldn't even know what the problem is, if you asked.  It's all about making other people happy.  I try not to bother you or the kids or anyone else with anything and then I just eventually have enough of it all.  The bottle can only get so full.  So, thank you for still loving me and understanding how I learned to be this way.  I can use your help with trying to learn a different way of communication that does not involve yelling at the people I love the most.

You sing in the shower

I love that you sing and whistle while you are in the shower.  I don't even know if you realize you do it.  But, it makes me realize that, even with all the stress of work and school, you still have a subconscious, upbeat attitude under the surface.

I Want You to Always Stay

As cheesy as it this is to admit, I heard Toto's Africa more than once on the radio this week.  And, I left it on each time.  Their lyrics, "there's not a lot that can drag me away from you...nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do" really struck me.  Yes, cheesy, I know. 

Seriously, though, I do not want anything to take us away from one another.  I know that no one else will ever complete my life the way that you do.  We have learned about each other's quirks over the last almost 15 years.  I can live with yours and hope you have accepted mine.  I know I've had some times where things I've done haven't been right for us, but I have learned from my mistakes and have changed my ways.  I am wholeheartedly committed to continuing our life together.  I am also wise enough to know that we have done an awful lot of things right in our time together.  We would not have come so far if we were interested in making everything easy.  We know how much reward there is in choosing the difficult path.  We know that everyone and every relationship is, at least slightly, different from another.  We know how much work it takes to keep a relationship strong and healthy, so that it and those involved can grow and change over time.  Family, friends, and others will always try to monopolize our time and energy.  I think it's just a selfish part of human nature.  I promise you that I will not let anyone stand between us or try to pull us away from each other. I will stand strong, as one, with you.  Always.

It's in Your Kiss

As it is Valentine's Day, I was reading an article about kissing and a first romantic kiss is often a more powerful memory than another type of sexual encounter.  It got me thinking about all of our firsts and I really do have fairly detailed memories of our intimate firsts, first kiss and otherwise.  The thing that struck me the most, though, was that our first kiss is the only one I remember.  With only the exception of a memory of the first romantic kiss I ever received (a peck on the cheek), I really cannot remember a single first kiss with any guy except for you.  Not one.  That speaks volumes to me.  There were important guys (or so I thought at the time), who I would think would have left a lasting impression.  But they didn't.  I have no recollection of those first kisses, despite the article's suggestion that I should.  I know we were meant to be and I know that first kiss from you was the most important experience of my life.  You walked me out to the car and leaned over to kiss me, after what seemed like weeks of getting as close as possible, without a kiss.  Maybe I hesitated because I knew that, deep down, that kiss would change everything.  And, it did.  Thank you for the only memorable first kiss I've ever had.  It's the only one I'll ever need.

Your Love of Food

I love that you are excited about food.  You don't just appreciate food, you are truly excited about it.  I have to thank you for exposing us to all different foods from all different cultures.  While I'm not the most adventurous, you are instilling an appreciation for a wide range of foods in me and our kids.  It may seem like they are picky sometimes, but our kids are prosciutto-eating, Bibimbap-loving, chopstick-wielding eaters.  Not many Americans can say that about their kids. 

I am thankful that your grandparents and parents nurtured an open mind about food in you.  Not only did they teach you to eat whatever "odd" food was placed in front of you, they also caused you to respect where the food comes from.  I am happy that our kids seem to be following in your footsteps.

That Incredible Voice

You have a voice that makes me melt.  Whether you sing or whisper, I love to hear the sound of your voice.  The deep tone of your voice can be soothing and, while it can also embellish your occasional anger and frustration, usually stays tempered.  I know you have thought about voice acting in the past and I hope that you keep that in the back of your mind as a possible hobby sometime in your life.  I know you would be great at it.  Or, maybe a sports announcer...after all, you always know what the announcers say before they even say it.  ;)

You Know Just What to Say

You don't dote on or coddle me.  You are truthful in what you say and often don't sugarcoat things.  Many women (and men, too, I bet) would find this quality a bit harsh and "improper," according to their standards.  However, I am happy to take pure truth from you.  Sometimes it hurts a bit, because the truth does that, but I'd rather have small hurts from truth than big hurts due to a snowball of lies.  We both know how important consistent honesty is to a strong, healthy relationship.

Part of your spoken honesty that always impresses me is that you seem to mindfully put your opinion out there.  You don't just say the words you think someone wants to hear.  Sometimes, it's quite the opposite.  But, when you say something that is deeply thoughtful and positive, I know you really mean what you say.  Thank you for all the times that you've known just the right thing to stay to cheer me up and turn things in a positive light.